Comfort and Hope

DSCF7913 croped and signed

Isaiah 41:10

Do not fear, for I am with you. Do not look around, for I am your Elohim. I shall fortify you, I shall also help you, I shall also uphold you with the right hand of My righteousness.

 

I opened my bible today and that’s what popped out at me. I haven’t read it in a while, and I’ve been praying for Him to show me what to do. Ironic isn’t it, I’ve been praying for guidance, but I haven’t read the book that He gave to guide us.

He’s shown me something’s and I’ve done them but things seem to be at a stand still, for the moment. I find myself scared that I’ve done something wrong, and looking around for things that I might have missed, even though He did not lead me in that direction. I won’t go into the details of what and where.

The last while I have been having a tough time standing on my feet. I seem to keep crumbling and He just keeps lifting me back up. So the end of the verse hit me too. What ever! The whole verse hit me period the end. It fit 100%, I can’t say that I’m relaxed and that I’m doing better, but it is very comforting to know that He’s there and He knows what I’m going through.

 

Onto the news. Well we’re still in Jerusalem, we’ll be leaving tomorrow, and heading north. I’ve got a head cold and Dads been sick the last few days. Sukkot in Jerusalem is really busy but there’s lots to do and see.

Sorry but I didn’t include a picture from my new camera. I haven’t had the chance to get it set up on the laptop yet.

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Exciting News! (with a bit of sad on the side)

We are now in Jerusalem, we were in Samaria for a few days visiting friends that were working in the vineyards, with the Waller group/Ya’hovel (if I spelled that right). We also got to help out in the vineyard. Its fun but not my line of work, I also got a nasty sunburn. Its blistering right now, right on the back of my neck. Oh so, very painful!

But it was worth it… I think, but I should have stayed out of the sun yesterday! It just made it worse.

Oh and some unfortunate news, my family’s mp3 officially died today, at least its unfortunate for me, actually its sad. I’m pretty sure my parents will be glad to see me with out the ear buds on.

It’s been my way of zoning out for the last 7 months. I’ve always found it easier that way, listening to praise music, I just feel so in tuned with Him. But maybe He’s teaching me not to rely on that music and learn to praise Him with the tin flute. I won’t say with singing because it is no pleasant sound, when I do it, and besides I can’t sing while playing the tin flute, so no loss there! But the words are important I think, the music is nice but isn’t it the words, that count?

I find it hard to practice because I don’t sound good at all, and we are in a hotel so that doesn’t sound fair to the other guests. Too all the music is on my dads laptop so to get to it isn’t really an easy thing to do. I really should get going on it. I did use it for a time earlier this year but people got tired of hearing the same song over and over, because I couldn’t totally remember the other songs I was learning or they got annoying too, so I stopped. I still bring it out every once and a while but I only play the songs up to 3 times before I put it away and I don’t attempt to learn anything new because, it sounds awful when I learn new ones. So to save peoples nerves and ears I leave it alone.

I’m not upset with anyone, and if I am it would be with myself, because I don’t have the self-esteem to pull it out and believe that I can get that tube of tin to sound nice! Its in note C and most music is made for D so its harder. But He has a reason for it, and I need to learn how to play it, because I know once I learn how its going to be a blessing to me. I just need to find that courage to pull it out and risk being told to stop playing.

On a better note I got a new !!!camera!!! Dad and Mom got it for me! Yahuweh knows that I’ve been praying for one, for a long time. It’s a Sony Cybershot, with 20 optical zoom and 18.2 megapixels! It’s a compact, and has more features on it than I will ever use! On a regular basis I mean. Of course I’ll use them all one day even if it is just once. It’s AWESOME! It takes twice as good pictures as my old one!

I can’t wait to get out and use it, it even has a gourmet food setting, so I can take better pictures of food. But when do I do that? Like I said so many features, I’ve even got one of those flexible tripods! I’ve always liked them.

Its like a dream come true! It still hasn’t really hit me that I’ve actually got a new camera. I still can’t believe that its mine, that its here, and that a dream is actually coming true!

I’ve been looking at getting into photojournalism, so this will be a big step in my process of getting there.

I heard something interesting while in Samaria:

“Many times we see possibilities,

Good possibilities, but will not go for them,

Because they are not perfect,

So we dismiss these good possibilities, because they are not perfect, and end up not doing anything.

Wouldn’t it be better to tryout these possibilities and of they aren’t right, trust Father will close the door. Instead of missing out on everything, by waiting for something perfect to plop into our lap.”

Interesting perspective isn’t it. Those aren’t the exact words but as close as I can remember.

Anyway, I think that’s all for tonight. I should post another one latter on, maybe with a picture from my new camera! Ok I’m kinda giddy about the camera if you couldn’t tell.

Dreams do matter

 

When I was younger I felt that I didn’t matter, and that my dreams were not important. I confronted that the other day. Now I realize that my dreams do matter, that I do matter.

If I did not buried my dreams I always held them at arms length. Like my brother posted on his blog http://fromthericefields.wordpress.com/ under the title post “I Have A Dream”. I also dreamed about helping people in the different groups. That was always where our hearts were. When the dream of getting a bigger “Home”, was crushed, I gave up. I still wanted to travel, but I was bitter. I was bitter towards my Abba, for putting us in a partly worse situation. Although He has a very good reason for this, I still feel that this is unfair at times.

Ever since my parents bought me, my first camera, and I learnt how to use it. I dreamed of becoming a photographer, and through the years that dream has grown. Now I realize it is not photography that interests me, it is photojournalism. I have put that dream in His hands, and I know that He has a plan for that dream. I just pray that I will not miss my chance.

But I realize that dreams are good for with out dreams and goals we don’t have a reason to live. It may not be a dream of a house or what people would normally dream or have goals of. But just having the goal of living our life for Him. Thinking about the dream He has put in you. Everyone has a purpose in life.

My older brother and I used to dream about forming an underground railroad when times get bad and people need to get out. It was quite far fetched but it was a dream that got us through hard times. Who knows maybe we will do something like that one day, or something similar.

This is what our old trailer looked like, then go to my brothers blog and see the pictures of what would have been exactly what we needed.

Van & trailer Our home for 5yrs

DSCF5081 - Copymy younger siblings, bed when folded down.

DSCF5082older brother gets top, I get bottom

DSCF5084as you can see not much room in the bathroom

DSCF5085bathroom counter

DSCF5087couch in back folded down for Mom and Dads Bed

DSCF5090kitchen and dinette. (remind me to post a photo of what it looked like on baking day)

DSCF5091and as you can see 2 people would have a big problem getting past in this hallway

So this is what we lived in for 5yrs. Now go and compare it to the fifth-wheel. That felt like a huge house, after living in here.

After living in such cramped space, we find an actual house way to big. We find that we lose each other and can go from breakfast to lunch to supper with out seeing someone.

Now, there were some very good times in this trailer, and I don’t regret living in it. It just grew too cramped. We had good times in those 5 years.

Well I think that is enough for today.

But remember Dreams are good, give them to Him. If they are to happen He will guide you to do so. Don’t give up on your dreams and goals.