When I was little I thought that Heaven sat on the clouds, and where there was a break Father could look down on us.
I know that it was juvenile of me, but everyone used to tell me that Heaven was above the clouds, and pictures that showed Heaven showed it sitting on the clouds. I used to sit and look at the clouds and wonder what Heaven looked like.
When the clouds were white and fluffy I knew that all was probably well, but when they were dark and stormy I knew something was wrong and I just hoped it wasn’t something I did.
I also used to believe that you couldn’t go above the clouds because then you would see Heaven and that was only a place where “good dead” people went.
Every time I saw clouds I thought,”Fathers right up there with all His Angels”. And in every break of cloud he would look down and smile at me, except when I was being bad. But, He didn’t frown at me, or get mad, He would just get very sad and start to cry. And that affected me more than any amount of anger could. Because I hated the thought that I was letting Him down, and disappointing Him.
My picture of Heaven was put to the test when I was 9. I had only been in a plane twice before that one when I was a baby, and the second time I was older but I slept pretty much the whole way. I had no problem with flying, it was when I realized that we were going to be above the clouds. In the clouds I didn’t mind because I was closer to Him but not quite at Heaven, because you have to be dead to go to heaven you know.
But, when I realized we would be above the clouds I freaked out, not physically of course but inside. I thought for sure I would see heaven then get hit with a bolt of lightning, or just strike me dead some how. My only comforting thought was that I would be closer to heaven when I died, less space to travel.
What confused me even more no one else seemed concerned. After we finally landed I figured out that the only danger I was in was crashing. Not being struck dead for flying above the clouds.
I learnt on that trip that Heaven isn’t on the clouds but way above it and we can’t see it. I must say to it kinda tore at my heart, that my picture of heaven and Father smiling down wasn’t 100% truth. It took me awhile to get over that.
Still to today, when I see clouds when I’m either above or below I still picture Him and all His Angels, with all the “good dead” people, up there watching me down below. Smiling watching me grow up, and when I make a mistake they get sad.
Ok this is juvenile but it helps me feel closer to Him, than when I think of Heaven being up in space like people say. When I fly and the clouds are under me I always think of it…